Crime Boss: Rockay City takes you for a wild ride, but also bashes you with a relentless flurry of clichés and ingenious sequences that tear you away from any immersion you may enjoy during your playthrough of the game.

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With a star-studded cast to rake in the big bucks, you’ll still find it hard to invest time into Baker’s story. Maybe it’s the irrational bits that fuel the story or the impossible feats some characters are capable of, things end up getting wacky right from the get-go. This game’s as janky as it gets, and not in a good way.

10 Sheriff Chuck Norris Is Too On-The-Nose

Imagine a city with no amicable powerful figures. Just a battle royale ground for a turf war fought between psychopaths trying to peddle their own product. Each one worse than the next, motivated to build their own empire. Somehow, Danny Trejo's in the mix too?

Who better to call in to save the city than Chuck Norris himself? You might expect a legendary actor or two to make a cameo in a big-budget video game, but to get them playing themselves in-universe just makes no sense. Couple that with a lack of any backstory or context for his entry whatsoever. It's an attempt to bank off of an outdated meme reference if anything.

9 Unbelievably Corny And Unrelatable Dialogue

Rockay City boasts all kinds of inhabitants, but none of them are quite as whacky and tacky as the main cast, who we’re forced to listen to for the majority of the game's first hour. It’s surprising to see any modern rappers talk like they just jumped out of a Grandmaster Flash music video.

Hielo and Touchdown say some of the most bizarre things one can imagine coming out from the mouth of a video game character in today’s world. It’s enough to make you backtrack and check whether you actually heard things right or not.

8 Touchdown Needs No Context To Get Started

Baker is a strong character, but he needed some help to get his team going and execute his plan to take over everyone's turf. So, what does he do? He rings up his old estranged pal Touchdown to ask him to do his dirty work.

However, what doesn’t make sense is how Touchdown picks up and from one single sentence completely deduces what Baker wants from him with literally no context given at all. It’s like they never separated at all.

7 Does The Mongol Empire Still Exist?

Of course, the country itself does - Pro-tip it’s nestled between Europe and China. But the way characters in-game talk about the Khan just makes it sound like there’s still an empire for the man to head back to.

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They even went so far as to call the guy Genghis Khan, which is quite the title for an individual we barely even see throughout most of the game. Don’t even waste your time investigating that dragon dogs legend Silver shares with Baker.

6 Melee Attacks With Guns Somehow Bend Metal Grates?

Believe it or not, somehow you’re capable of smashing off a metal grate in a vault van by just hitting it with the hilt of your gun a couple of times. As unlikely as it sounds, there’s no better way of getting your hands on the goods stashed inside anyhow.

Save yourself the time and effort, just stop questioning why some of the things in this game work the way they do and just enjoy the whackiness on display.

5 Small Safes Are Incredibly Sturdy For No Apparent Reason

For no reason specified whatsoever, this blow collection was stashed behind what could either be considered one of the world’s strongest safes. Either that, or it's an example of how impeccably reliable safe manufacturers in Rockay City actually are.

It takes a comically large drill to get into a safe, and unfortunately, the process isn’t as swift as you’d assume, considering the hardware at play here. It’s going to take you a good while before you end up getting anywhere with that drill.

4 A Full Health Regen After A Revive?

Sure, you can expect to take cover and slowly passive-regen your health back the old-fashioned way, but why not go in guns blazing since you know your guns for hire can revive you back to full health?

Of course, if you’d like to abandon your pals and leave them behind since you’re not strapped for cash, that’s a good yet heartless way to finish the mission too. You’re already playing an immoral murder machine as is, so why not?

3 Stealth Hits Somehow One Shot Enemies?

In a game where NPCs take a lot of time and bullets to kill, a stealth punch to the lower back is all it takes to down a fully grown man.

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One punch with your gun from behind is enough to kill your enemies for good if you’re performing a stealth attack. Even though it makes no sense at all, it’s still a fun way to sneak around and save up on your ammo.

2 Pummeling Boxes With Punches Is Somehow Stealthy

Breaking into a warehouse without getting detected is kind of tough when the game spooks enemies and makes them aware of your presence just for sliding down a ladder too fast.

Well, if that’s really the case, then why are you able to get away scot-free bruising your hands and taking jabs at wooden crates? You actually see the chunks or splinters fly off. It’d make some sense if it was two or three crates you’d need to break, but this was just a bizarre experience for a stealth segment.

1 The Hilarious NPC Idle Animations

Fumbling around outside, waiting for a getaway vehicle with your crew sounds like a swell time, until you realize the cops are here and your pals are barely aware of it. It’s even funnier to notice them take their sweet time trying to buffer in the right direction to aim.

Although, don’t feel too bad since even the civilians barely know what’s going on or what they should do when you're shooting up the area. Clipping through a bench doesn’t help with their escape either.

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