Pokemon Scarlet & Violet was not a good video game. Or they weren’t good video games. Are these pairs of Pokemon plural, or a single entity? This question is one of many annoyances about Pokemon, and Scarlet & Violet exacerbated most of them.

The game’s stale formula felt worse as Game Freak tried to mix it up with an ‘open world’ approach, but only made things worse. Pokemon games have increasingly felt behind the times, and the poor graphics, slow pacing of battles, and extreme hand-holding highlighted this further. Playing Pokemon off the back of a great turn-based title like Persona 5 makes you realise how bad Pokemon is. Unlike many of the game’s defenders, I didn’t care for the writing or narrative either - a repetitive and all too predictable tale that played it far too safe. And yet I played The Teal Mask anyway.

Related: Pokemon Scarlet & Violet: Every New Pokemon In The Teal Mask DLC

Pokemon’s biggest problem is not its graphics, or its release cycle, or its failure to innovate even when it tries. It’s me. Me and all the people like me. Too many of us accept low standards, perhaps even celebrate them because there is no other game able to rival Pokemon’s ability to let you create a team of little freaks. And, god help me, I’m enjoying the Teal Mask thanks to these low standards.

Back when I played the base game, regular readers might remember I attempted something new to shake things up. Knowing that Pokemon games are abominably easy, I tried to play the game as a Gym Leader, starting with Sprigatito and building a team of Grass-type beasts from there. I had done something similar for the Sword & Shield DLC, and respected the extra challenge it gave me. I suppose it felt like I was playing a video game, whereas Pokemon can often feel more like a visual novel where the only option is to win.

It started off well enough, as I needed clever strategies in my catching, movepool, and Tera-types to build a diverse enough roster. It pushed me to explore a little wider, and motivated me to seek out Tsareena. It gave me the challenge I wanted. But at a certain point, it was just a roadblock. Scarlet & Violet was not good, and so elongating my time playing it was a bad strategy. I wanted to see it through to the end to see if the open world ever actually felt alive, if it had a purpose beyond letting you choose which gym you face (even though their difficulty was fixed). Scarlet & Violet didn’t deserve the chances I gave it.

And yet I gave it one more with The Teal Mask. So far, it’s not great. I’ve already written about how the opening highlights what remains Pokemon’s biggest issue - its lack of trust in its audience. But following my colleague Ben Sledge’s advice I have finally ditched my Gym Leader Team and, through my boxes and a bit of catching, have a more balanced team that I enjoy having around me. I’m overleveled, at least for the opening exchanges, so I can speed through it a little faster.

It’s not exactly a glowing recommendation. But I have to admit that after removing a level of self-inflicted annoyance, I am starting to feel a little better about Scarlet & Violet as a whole. Maybe it was the perfect game for me to push it to the limit until it broke - better that than sour my first experience of Arceus or HeartGold, right? I still don’t think Pokemon is in a good place right now. It claims Scarlet & Violet is a risk because of its open world, but from the tutorial to the protagonist to the gyms to the narrative, there are too many factors that Pokemon refuses to change.

Still, despite it all, if I play my own way I can enjoy myself in Scarlet & Violet. Maybe that’s the worst thing about Pokemon - no matter how bad it gets, it still feels good.

Next: The Best Fan-Made Pokemon Games