It’s always been a sore spot for me that almost every classic game that my peers and friends played as kids completely passed me by. As a little Asian kid who was, stereotypically, told that my academic success was more important than my interest in gaming, my access to video games was severely limited. Add to that the fact that all my friends at that age were equally dedicated to school over other hobbies, and you get someone with a severely stunted understanding of the video game canon.

I didn’t know Final Fantasy even existed until I was a teenager. At some point somebody must have told me that they loved the series, and I thought that I’d eventually get around to checking it out. It is 2024, I haven’t been a teenager in almost a decade, and until I downloaded the FF7 Rebirth demo, I still hadn’t played a single Final Fantasy game. Last year I wrote that FF16 would be the one I finally entered the series with, and I was wrong – when it came out, I didn’t have a PS5, and by the time I got one at the end of last year, there were simply too many other games to play.

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But I’ve always felt it was necessary for me to understand what everybody loves about this series, on a personal level as much as a professional one. Yes, playing classic games and their remakes expands my knowledge and understanding of the medium I write about, which is important and necessary. But I’m also a little bitter that my friends know something I don't. They played Final Fantasy 7 in its original form, and they can all share and discuss that experience. In the end, it’s pettiness and my fear of missing out that most makes me want to finally get into the series. Typical of me.

So I downloaded the Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth demo on my PS5. Obviously, I had no idea what was going on. I didn’t play FF7 or its 2020 Remake, and I have a thing about spoiling games for myself no matter how old they are – if there’s even a sliver of a chance I’ll eventually get around to playing a game, I’m not going to seek out information about its story.. That means that I got all my information about the game’s lore and story from the relatively brief video included in the game that describes what’s happened up to this point, and I’m missing a lot. I started the demo with no clue who these characters are, how they feel about each other, or where they came from.

It’s particularly painful that I know playing Final Fantasy 7 Remake will fix these problems, because I don’t have time to play a 30 hour game before Rebirth comes out at the end of February. And since Rebirth is the second part of a trilogy reinterpreting a single game, starting with this game is like starting a book in the middle. Technically, I don’t have to play Rebirth, but after playing this demo, I want to.

Despite the classic combat mode being controversial on release, I really enjoy the hybrid turn-based and action gameplay. And even though I don’t really know who Cloud and Sephiroth are or what they’ve done, the developer’s choice to have the demo focus on how their relationship began has made me actually care about the characters. I don’t know why Cloud’s memories keep flickering and freezing so strangely, but I want to know. I’m compelled, despite knowing that I’m going to be confused.

Yes, fine, it helps that Sephiroth is hot.

The demo, despite highlighting some flaws that I already know are going to annoy me (those mako vacuums aren’t gonna be a consistent thing, are they?), has convinced me that the game is worth a shot, at the very least. But it’s also clear to me that the feeling of having missed something isn’t going to go away until I play FF7 Remake, and maybe even the original games, considering that this new trilogy tells a different story from the 1997 game. If this is about experiencing what I’ve missed, this game isn’t going to fulfill that for me. But maybe it doesn’t have to be that serious – I can enjoy Rebirth for what it is and let that push me into other games in the series that I should have played a decade ago. The best time to have played a game is when it came out, but the second best time is right now.

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