Baldur’s Gate 3's Astarion is the bleeding heart of many fans, but making this jaded vampire your sweetheart is not as easy as other companions. Getting on his good side may require you to make decisions you normally would guffaw at, but those armed with the right knowledge and enough sheer willpower may be able to romance this shadowed killer and pull him to the light.
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PostsWell, that is, if you even want to. The powers of darkness call in sickeningly sweet tones, and for those of you wanting to edge into that world, there's certainly a well of power waiting for you alongside your dark companion. No matter what you choose, however, you'll probably want this guide to set you on the path of your desires.
Updated May 12, 2024 by Alexis Campbell: We've added more potential +5 or higher Approval opportunities and expanded suggestions on correct dialogue choices. We've also included potential ways to trigger Act One scenes while playing in Act Two, as well as minor edits to include Patch 6 changes and notes.
This guide contains spoilers regarding Astarion's backstory and personal quests.
Where To Find Astarion
Astarion is likely to be one of the first companions you naturally find during your exploration of the Ravaged Beach area.
You can reach him immediately from the starting point of your game by taking your first left into the Nautiloid Ship (where three Intellect Devourers can be found) and exiting the ship through the large hole on the opposite side of your entrance. Astarion is standing at the top of the hill past several crates and beside a burning Nautiloid pod.
As you near, you'll trigger a cutscene where he'll ask for help. You can accept or refuse, but either way will result in him trying to attack you.
You can either fight him or try to convince him you're no threat, but either way, you'll eventually be given the option to either add him to your party (active or in camp) or dismiss him. If you dismiss him, you can return to him and recruit him later during Act One.
How To Raise Astarion's Approval
Astarion is a jaded individual with aproclivity for evil. In general, you should keep these facts in mind when choosing dialogue options with him:
- Choosing power-hungry or downright evil options will generally gain his Approval.
- He heavily dislikes pity, so you should also assume that he won't appreciate having a bleeding heart coddle him or anyone else.
- Try not to be too much of a goody-two-shoes, and keep the heroics to a minimum (at least in dialogue).
- If you choose to take the good path, you can gain Approval if you help characters in need when there is a clear reward or benefit.
- Refrain from limiting his autonomy or desires - such as preventing him from pursuing power.
- Always embrace independence, relying on no one other than yourself (and maybe Astarion).
While there are many actions and options that will improve his opinion of you, the table below covers those that will raise his Approval of you the most (by +5 Approval Points or more):
Beware of quest spoilers!
Act One
Location
Choice To Raise Approval
Druid Grove
Attack Nettie after she tells you to poison yourself.
Druid Grove
Travel to the grove with the goblins and tell Zevlor that you've decided to side with the aforementioned goblins.
Druid Grove
Attack the druids and tieflings before the goblins arrive and, when prompted in dialogue, side against Minthara.
Riverside Teahouse
Speak with Gandrel the Gur and allow Astarion to kill him.
Riverside Teahouse
When fighting Auntie Ethel, allow her to escape (with or without Mayrina).
Riverside Teahouse
After defeating Auntie Ethel, resurrect Mayrina's husband, give her the staff, and tell Astarion that it was funny.
Blighted Village
After finding the Amethyst for the Necromancy of Thay, choose to give the book to Astarion.
Blighted Village
Interrupt the Bugbear and the Ogre in the barn outside the village or allow Astarion to.
House of Hope
When taken by Raphael, threaten the devil by demanding Raphael fix things or die by your hand.
Goblin's Camp
Agree to be tortured by the priest of Loviatar, Abdirak. Endure them, but do not attempt to resist crying out in pain.
Underdark - Festering Cove
Tell BOOOAL, the redcap, that he is a fake god. Threaten to kill him and take his power.
Camp - Feeding Night Event
Allow Astarion to feed on you without making any threats. When questioned in the morning, state that you trust Astarion. Tell other party members that if they don't like Astarion, they can leave.
Camp - Random Dialogue
Tell Astarion how you'd like to die (decapitation, stabbing, or poison). You can alternatively threaten to spill his guts and take him down with you if he tries for +4 Approval overall.
Camp - Celebration Event
During the party at the end of Act One (with either the goblins or tieflings), choose to spend the night with Astarion. After, playfully expose your neck to Astarion.
Camp - About Cazador
After Cazador is mentioned, tell Astarion that you'll each watch each other's backs.
Act Two
Location
Choice To Raise Approval
Last Light Inn
Refuse to drink the truth-serum wine that Jaheira offers.
Moonrise Towers
Tell Araj that Astarion is his own person and refuse to force Astarion to drink her blood. After, for an additional +5, tell Astarion he never has to do anything he does not wish.
Shar's Sanctum
Attack Yurgir (+5) OR Persuade him to kill all of his minions and then himself (Disapproval -1 first and then +5 after).
Camp - Truth About Cazador
Agree to help Astarion hunt down and kill Cazador.
Act Three*
Location
Choice To Raise Approval
Circus of Last Days
Complete the Trial of Love while answering all questions correctly.
Open Hand Temple
Finish the Cursed Monk questline and accept (and resist) the curse.
Wyrm's Rock Fortress
Enter the barracks and wake the Barracks Guards. After being confronted by Fist Reynash, taunt him and call his supposed attempt at guarding embarassing.
Blushing Mermaid
Compliment Auntie Ethel on her evil plan. Then, demand the child back. When she refuses, throw Hag's Bane and mock her.
Szarr Palace
Persuade Astarion to not go through with the Rite of Ascension and then allow the vampire slaves to leave for the Underdark on the condition they control their hunger.
House of Grief
Choose to kill Viconia DeVir.
House of Hope
Refuse all of Harleep's advances.
read moreThere are no known actions in Act Three that will improve Astarion's rating by +5. Those included in the list grant +2 or more.
Additionally, Jaheira's truth-wine in Act Two is only +3 but added due to the scarcity of notable Approval gains in Act Two.
How To Romance Astarion In Act One
There are plenty of opportunities to get on Astarion's good side during Act One. Your goal during this Act will be to choose enough options to earn his favor to increase his opinion of you to 'Good' or the upper echelons of 'Neutral.'
You can check this by opening his Character sheet and examining his Approval bar.
Once you reach 'Good,' and presuming you've already had Astarion either bite you or willingly confess his Vampirism to you, you'll be able to pursue his romance during the celebration event at the end of Act One by saving or destroying the Druid's Grove.
Speaking with him, the dialogue trees that lead to a successful night are represented below:
It's not that bad. Think of all the goblins that you killed.
Take his bottle and try the wine.
And what's your idea of 'a little fun'?
Knowing you, it probably is.
All right, let's do it. I'll see you later.
Maybe. If you say 'please.'
-
[PERSUASION 15] Say 'please.'
I'm kidding. Once everyone's asleep, I'll find you and we can have some fun.
-
Good boy! Let's get together tonight.
-
You do not necessarily need to romance Astarion during the Celebration. If you have not begun to seriously pursue another character in Act One, Astarion may otherwise proposition you in camp if his Approval is high enough. If you feel like you missed out, you don't need to worry so long as you have not proceeded to Act Two and entered the Shadowlands.
Spending your night with Astarion, you can improve his opinion of you further by offering your neck to him. There is no great drawback for doing this, unlike the potential of dying during your first encounter with Astarion's vampirism.
As long as you don't insult - or incinerate - Astarion, your romance with him can now officially begin.
You can ask him about the marks during the morning after without any drawbacks so long as you do not insult him or dig too deep into his mental trauma.
How To Romance Astarion In Act Two
In Act Two, your relationship with Astarion will deepen. You'll need to continue growing his approval, and the best way to do this is by completing two important sidequests:
- Araj's Blood Request
- Kill Raphael's Old Enemy
There will also be a moment at camp where you can try to determine the nature of Astarion's back markings. This slightly improves his relationship with you while also advancing his questline. You'll need to pass an Arcana check to receive the fullest benefit.
The first is the easiest done and can be quickly finished in Moonrise Towers. You'll find Araj Oblodra in a side room on the left side of the towers as you enter in her alchemical laboratory.
Speaking with her with Astarion in your party, you should refuse to force Astarion to bite her firmly and under all circumstances.
Meanwhile, Kill Raphael's Old Enemy is a more difficult, lengthy quest that will both raise Astarion's Approval and advance his personal quest. It will require you to:
- Speak with Raphael at Last Light Inn.
- Find Raphael again outside Shar's Sanctum/Thorm Mausoleum.
- Kill Yurgir in Shar's Sanctum or Persuade him to kill himself.
Once Astarion's Approval is high enough, the next checkpoint for your relationship will be a confession from Astarion. He'll confess that he slept with you only to use you and, if you completed the conversation with Araj, thank you for not forcing him to do something he wasn't comfortable with.
Tell Astarion that you wouldn't force him to do anything, be supportive, and most importantly, state "I care about you."
From this point, you can choose any of the options for a positive outcome, though the highest approval will come from these choices:
- "Open your mind to him so he sees you care."
- "Hug him."
From this point on, you'll be able to have special dialogue with Astarion about your relationship.
As of Patch 6, there are additional animations for Astarion's kiss scene. We highly recommend any Astarion romancer to return to this special dialogue button from time-to-time to discover all the possible animations.
How To Romance Astarion In Act Three
In Act Three, you'll finally put an end to his personal questline. You won't need to farm any Approval at this point, most likely, so focus on finishing the Szarr Palace dungeon.
For help with it, see our official walkthrough guide.
At the end, you'll be given a massive choice that will drastically impact how Astarion behaves and interacts with you for the remainder of the game.
- Choosing to allow Astarion ascend will embrace Astarion's evil side and lead to 'Ascended Astarion.'
- Choose to Persuade Astarion to reject the ascension will result in Astarion remaining as 'Spawn Astarion.'
Each will trigger a special camp event afterward that vastly differs depending on the route you chose for Astarion.
What Happens If You Allow Astarion To Ascend? (Ascended Astarion)
Ascended Astarion is the evil option of the two personality endings for Astarion. He will become far more powerful while also fully embracing his cruel side.
During his special camp event, he'll make you the offer of becoming his eternal vampire companion - more than a regular spawn. You'll have the opportunity to enjoy "one last night" with him as your final intimate, explicit encounter of the game.
After becoming his spawn, he'll have the power to control you (though he states he would never have to...would he?) and has extended his Ascension's powers to allow you to walk freely in the sun.
Although your relationship at this point is technically sealed, there is a way to bypass your ending with Astarion and stop being a vampire. You can choose to become an Illithid, but doing this will mean that Astarion will break up with you. He'll refer to you as disgusting or ugly in the epilogue.
The normal epilogue will reveal that you've become his vampire mate (or consort), holding grand and lavish balls at the Szarr Palace with the purpose of drinking blood and vying for political power. As a powerful duo, you've taken over Baldur's Gate in your own way.
Astarion does not mingle with the other companions during the party, believing himself to be far superior to them. His pompous and powerful demeanor will embrace the flaws of Cazador in many ways.
However, despite his flaws, Astarion will be more confident and powerful than ever. This ending, while soured by the implication he'll eventually become a new Cazador, is an excellent ending for evil playthroughs and for those that play a character that believes they may somehow keep Astarion in line.
What Happens If You Stop Astarion's Ascension? (Spawn Astarion)
A more tame option for Astarion's ending, he'll deny Cazador's many flaws and instead choose to embrace morality in his own, twisted way. As a spawn forever, he'll have no power to walk in the sun again. But beyond that, he'll have a love of equal say and power in his relationship with you.
After defeating Cazador, you'll unlock a special scene where he takes you to his grave. Be patient with him and choose to support his journey to self-acceptance. If you accept, you'll be given the opportunity to share a night of passion with Astarion on his own grave.
In his epilogue, he states that six months of bliss with you have outweighed two hundred years of misery. He appears happy and grateful for his journey, as well as wishing happiness on your fellow companions.
You've been focused on a cure for Astarion's vampirism in the meantime while adventuring and putting Astarion's talents of killing people (the right people) to good use.
This ending fits best for redeemed Dark Urges and good Tav playthroughs due to Astarion's redeemed sensibilities, positive outlook, and generally healthy romantic relationship.
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