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One of Kyle’s chickens died. That’s a bummer. His dog got a hold of it and it was bye-bye birdie.

Kyle’s misfortune somehow led to Darren’s wild postulation that he’d have no problem eating Zack and that he’d have no problem if Zack ate him. It’s a games-journalist-eat-games-journalist world out there.

That got us thinking: Where do you even start if you’re forced to cannibalize someone? We’re not talkin’ about Hannibal Lecter making a gourmet meal that pairs well with a nice chianti; we’re talkin’ “What part of a human gives you the best chance to survive in dire conditions?”

Here’s a look into our thought process:

The butt. Or the thighs. We’re eating both.

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