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Hey kid, wanna see a dead body? Oh. Well. You wanna see some really cool video game news… In the back of my van?

Uh. Anyway. The guy from Crytek says the PS Vita is gonna fail, and the guy from Naughty Dog says the Wii U is gonna fail. Girls who eat Doritos and play video games really like to have sex, but hate taking baths. Or something. Aliens: Infestation has butts, cursing, gore, Xenomorphs, and I’m chomping at the bit to pre-order it (once it gets announced.) The 3DS is selling like whatever the opposite of wildfire and hotcakes is, Bastion looks cool, and Metro: Last Light doesn’t have any lights in it.

Also, we’re doing a kickass LIVE show next Friday, at 4 PM Pacific, 7 PM Eastern. It’s Friday night, so I don’t feel like looking up the metric time.

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